How We Keep People Alive, Even After They’re Gone
In life, we all lose people we love – With some the loss is temporary and with some the loss is permenant.
And after we lose someone dear to our heart, many times we want to keep their memories alive on a day-to-day basis. We want them to be an integral part of our lives ; and yet we fail because we are always pressed for time.
When someone we love dies, we often fear that we will forget them. We fear that we may forget what they look like, their fragrance, their smile or the sound of their laughter.
There are so many ways we can honor and keep alive the memories of those we love. We are only limited to our own limitations when it comes to honoring and remembering our loved ones. Like anything else in our grieving, it is finding what is best for YOU, and what you are comfortable with.
I recently lost one of my good friends to a car accident. I sometimes try so hard to remember the sound of his voice. With every loss comes a painful process to overcome it.
Here are 5 things you can try, to cope with the loss of someone dear to you:
Develop a positive habit which they had – Everyone has some positive habit worth emulating.. So it could be simple things like Waking up early everyday (say at 6 AM), Taking a walk everyday, Flossing everyday, Reading a book daily, Sleeping early, Having an early dinner daily, etc etc etc. And once you develop this habit, you can’t help but think of them everytime you are do this!
Introduce something they like into your daily routine – Something very simple and integral to your day to day life. So for e.g.: If they liked a specific color like Red, then you use a Red toothbrush everyday (And you will brush everyday!), Or If they liked a specific food like salads / fruits, add it to your everyday diet
Set your account passwords in their name – Yes! So many online / social media accounts gives you a golden opportunity for this – You can set the password for the most frequently accessed accounts in their name. For e.g.: EMail, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc. I have personally found this to be so effective and powerful simply because I login everyday several times to several of my accounts.. And everytime I do, I remember the person / people whose memory I want to keep alive
Think of them for a few minutes everyday – Think of the many wonderful shared moments, special memories, unforgettable laughs, the journey and times together, the laughs, cries, adventures, disagreements, arguments, etc. etc. etc. – And you should do this either at the start of the day or end of the day (All other times its hard to predict your mood, schedule and environment)… But just a few minutes by yourself go a long way in keeping someone’s memory alive
Wear something in their name and honor – This is a little personal, nevertheless very effective! It could be something they wore or something they gifted you.. But it should be something you can wear easily on yourself on a daily basis – Like a watch, or bangle, or finger ring, or chain, etc etc. – Something of personal significance.. And everytime you see it or touch it, you can’t help but remember the person whose memory you want to keep alive….
Here’s a great example of how you can honor those who are gone. Written by Hannah Gordon for Thought Catalog.
Photo credit: Thoughtware.com